I didn't know it was that Flammable
by LadyBeryl
Summary: Enzo and Dean go to a bar. Things don't end well. Cass and Sami are exasperated. Cross posted to my Ao3, TitaniumKitten. (Decided to make this a series (sort of) dealing with the various shenanigans & misadventures that Dean gets into. It will be updated as inspiration finds me. Timeline will skip around a bit, depending on where ideas fit the best.)
1. I didn't know it was that Flammable

Author's Note: Silly little fic because I like the dynamic between Sami and Dean. Also I feel Enzo and Dean would be thick as thieves. Set some time before Money in the Bank. I'm very new at fanfiction, so please excuse any mistakes.

"I didn't know alcohol was flammable, dude!" Enzo pants as they run along the sidewalk, police and fire engine sirens blaring behind them

"Didn't know it was flammable?!" Dean gasps, pulling Enzo into an alley way just as a police cruiser comes into sight.

"Well…" 'Zo amends, "I didn't know it was THAT flammable."

Dean stares at him incredulously for a few seconds before a broad grin crosses his face, which turns into chuckles, then a full on belly laugh. Enzo scratches the back of his head sheepishly.

"I didn't know it was that flammable…" Dean manages to get out between bouts of helpless laughter. "Fuck, did you see the look on that shitty bartender's face?"

"Don't forget, bartender and bar owner. He was a grade A prick too." Enzo snorts

"Fucking right. Tryin' to get in that girl's pants and wouldn't take no for an answer. Then having his bouncers try and rough us up when we get in his face about it."

"So I figure we was just karma, ya got me? Though all I wanted to do was get him to shit his pants, not set his car on fire." Enzo says ruefully.

Dean snickers. "Well next time you decide to start a dumpster fire, make sure you aren't dripping the booze all over the parking lot before you use my lighter. Damn near came close to setting my boots on fire."

'We uh, we aren't tellin' anyone about this, right? I mean, Cass and Sami are back at the hotel right now, aren't they?"

Dean freezes and looks highly concerned. "Hell no, I don't want Sami to know about this. He already has enough to worry about, ya know. And I don't want him mad at me. I don't want the look again."

Enzo makes a confused face.

"He has this real like…huffy..disappointed look he gets and I don't wanna see that again." He shudders. "I mean, it's not my fault that one time the nunchucks slipped and made a hole in the hotel room wall. That's the first time I saw "the look." He made me pay for the damages too. Knowing him, he'll make us pay for the guys car."

Enzo nods. "True. And it was a pretty classy joint. Bet that guy could afford a new one pretty easy."

"Exactly." Dean nods, then peeks his head out from the alley way. "We're good. Come on."

The two men exit the alley and start walking in the general direction of their hotel, picking up a six pack on their way since according to Dean "they didn't get enough time to get their drink on" before they were thrown out of the bar.

"Cass 'n Sami are probably still hanging out in your room. So..go to ours? I still feel a little weird about drinking around Sami, ya know." Dean suggests as the head to the hotel elevator.

"Sure." Enzo agrees as they make their way down the hallway to Dean and Sami's room.

Dean slides in the key, murmuring a "Fuck yeah!" when it works on the first go.. 'Zo finds himself walking into Dean's back as he freezes in the short hotel room hallway. "Oh shit!" Dean mumbles and Enzo peers around him.

Contrary to Dean's prediction, both Sami and Cass are in the room. The tv is on..breaking news about a car being set on fire at a local bar. Cass has his arms folded over his chest and gives Enzo a glare. 'Zo smiles nervously and glances at Sami. "Huh," he muses, "So that's what "the look" looks like."


	2. All Ideas are Good Ideas

Authors Note: Not a direct continuation of the last chapter, but within the same 'verse. Continuing the misadventures of Mr. Ambrose and Mr. Amore.

Dean snuck out of the hotel lobby. Furtively he tiptoed around the building, giving a relieved sigh at not being caught. Taking refuge behind a dumpster that only reeked a little, he took a battered pack out of his back pocket. Picking out a cigarette with his slim fingers, he brought it to his lips and lit it, taking a satisfied sigh as the taste of Newport Blue filled his mouth. A slight cough behind him made him jump and scrabble to hide the cigarette behind his back as he turned.

"Holy hell, 'Zo. Scared the shit outta me." He gasped

"Sorry bro." Enzo Amore shrugged. "You smokin'? Thought you quit a long time ago."

"I did. Sort of. Keep a pack around for emergencies."

Enzo looked worried. "You got an emergency?"

"Not..not really. Just sorta stress, you know?" Dean scuffed his boots against the pavement. "I mean, don't get me wrong. Love being champ. Love sticking it in Rollins' face. He makes the best pissy faces. But, uh, sometimes it gets a bit overwhelming. This is my first cig since Money in the Bank. And before that, WrestleMania."

"I get it. We all got our vices." Enzo pulls an oddly shaped electronic looking device from his pocket. "This is mine."

"What the hell is that?" Dean peers at the device. "Looks like one of them Men in Black pen things."

"Nothin' to do with aliens. It's a vape."

"I heard of those. Put nicotine or whatever in it?"

"Used to be nicotine, but Cass drew a line. Just use the flavored stuff. This one's fruit loops."

Dean looked interested. "Huh, sounds kinda cool. But...you don't have to hide it or anything, so why you back here?"

"Saw you sneaking around, wanted to make sure everything was ok." 'Zo answered.

"Damn, gotta work on my sneaking. But thanks man. Just...Sami thinks I've one hundred percent given this shit up and I don't wanna disappoint him." Dean flushed a little. "He's a nice dude. Dunno why he puts up with me."

"Cause you're a nice dude too, Dean. Don't put yourself down."

Dean gave a shy smile and they stand shoulder to shoulder, enjoying their respective vices in a companionable silence.

"Oh, dude, I almost forgot to tell you. Was thinking of getting a new tat and want to see what you think. Come up to our room?"

Dean nods and stubs out the last remnants of his cigarette. Making absolutely sure it is out before throwing the butt in the dumpster and following his friend back into the hotel.

Settled on the one king bed in the room (he would never think of reading into it) Dean waits patiently as Enzo pokes around in a duffle bag, coming back with a couple sketches on paper.

"Knuckle tats. Cass doesn't want me to get 'em but it's my life, ain't it?" he proclaims proudly, placing the sketches on Dean's lap.

"Wow, cool!" Dean remarks.

"So, not sure if I wanna get VAPE LIFE or VAPE LYFE or VAPE THIS."

Dean falls deep in thought, scrutinizing the sketches which each have a different style and font.

"I think the 'vape lyfe' is more edgy, but the 'vape this' is more aggressive. Vape life is cool, but pretty vanilla. What kinda impression were you going for?"

Enzo hmms, pondering Dean's question. "I think...edgy, you know? Gotta show people I mean business, right? How you doin'. So Vape Lyfe would be the best."

"It will look awesome! I think this will look great with all your other ones." Dean nods enthusiastically.

Enzo offers a beer from the well stocked hotel mini fridge and they both sit on the bed, discussing tattoos. One beer turns into 4 each and 'Zo is giggling as Dean tells a story from his Indie days.

"So, Me 'n Deja Vu are in dog collars. And Vu is this huge guy. Got me out weighed by like at least a hundred pounds. He wraps the chain around his arm and just nails me with it. My left eye was a little lazy for like a week afterwards. Almost crushed me by laying his entire body on me for the three count too, the asshole. Took me out for McDonald's after though. Kinda miss that scene a little."

"Yeah, I can just see the tumblr girls go crazy if you did a dog collar match nowadays." Enzo snorted

"What's tumblr?"

Enzo waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it. So you sure you wouldn't get a tattoo?"

"Dunno." Dean says, slowly peeling the label off a beer bottle. "I can't really think of what I'd want."

"I got a coupla books and everything!" Enzo stumbles towards his duffle bag and muffled cursing ensues as he wrestles with it, finally removing the books and making an unsteady way back to the bed.

They paw through them, finally deciding on three wolf moon for Dean's left bicep and the Joker on his right calf. Enzo is pretty sure Dean isn't aware of the social media connotations about three wolf moon as Dean just said "Wolves are badass and three wolves are better than one." A phonebook is found in the hotel room nightstand and Enzo tries to count how many beers have been consumed between the two of them. Dean insists they go to Avon Tattoo Parlor because "If you say it slowly and mumble a little it sounds like A1 and A1 steak sauce is fucking delicious."

They call a cab, because they are responsible adults, and make their way outside the hotel to wait for it. Enzo is clutching the VAPE LYFE sketch to his chest and Dean throws caution to the wind and lights another cigarette.

"There you are!" exclaims a voice to their left. "I've been looking everywhere for you. Dean, we were supposed to meet up for dinner, remember?"

Dean curses, his reaction time too slow to hide the cig between his fingers and he yelps slightly as he manages to burn himself in the haste of trying to snuff it out.

"S-sami…how you doin'?" Enzo slurs, trying and failing miserably to run interference for his friend by throwing an arm around Sami's shoulders.

"Dean!" Sami exclaims. "Is that a cigarette?!"

Dean hangs his head sulkily, nursing the burn on his hand. "Don't gimmie "the look", Sami. Just needed some relaxation. Plus..plus…'Zo is gonna get a tattoo that Cass doesn't want him to get!"

"Dean!" Enzo squeaks, a look of shock and betrayal on his face. "Well you were gonna get a three wolf moon tat!"

"Holy hell, 'Zo. Not those damn knuckle tats again!" a deep voice tinged with exasperation comes from behind them.

Whirling around again, Dean and Enzo gape up at the unimpressed face of Big Cass.

"I…." Enzo gulps.

Sami, "the look" firmly set on his face, growls one word. "Inside!"

Enzo and Dean, sulky and cowed, turn to head back into the hotel, Sami and Cass following closely behind them.

The sound of a throat clearing nervously makes all four men turn around.

"Umm...anyone here order a cab?"


End file.
